Aloha 'Oe -- Memorial Day

It seems the older we get the more significant Memorial Day becomes; not surprising that we now have a better appreciation for how our parents used to habitually read the obituaries. I remember a visit to Ohau's famous National Memorial Cemetery over 45 years ago set in Pouwaina Crater and home to thousands of veterans and their families.  ("click" on photos for larger view)

Small Puna Cemetery

Here in rural Puna on the Big Island, we have found several small unnamed cemeteries. Yesterday, flowers in hand, we visited three, all tucked back a little from the road...all with ocean views!  (I also offered a halting, newly learned song, "Hawai'i Aloha.) "Hear this lovely mele!!

Each setting is like a window in time -- each grouping seems to carry its own personal, quiet ambiance. Every year local people (relatives and not) caravan down to Puna's famous "Red Road" to be sure that grave sites are cleaned and decorated -- some elaborate, some simple. These humble clusters of graves, found along the side of the road, offer reminders of village life 100 years ago.

One of our fondest memories during a Michigan visit to Phil's mom was a stroll with Margaret through the local cemetery where she pointed out plots with names going back on both sides for many generations.

Our home altar - those loved and lost

This year we set up our family altar as a shrine of remembrance of those we have known, loved and lost including parents and "best persons" from our wedding; from baby Kummar who lived only 100 days, to much loved and respected teachers and elders who reached nearly 100 years.

One of the many interesting cultural differences here in Hawai'i is the very obvious respect given to elders -- the Kupuna, who are the carriers and teachers of tradition, language and culture. 

"OLA NA IWI"  (The bones live!)

Saying Goodbye

If you remember either your grandparents or parents review of the newspaper obituaries, you are not alone.  This was particularly true for Phil's mother, Margaret, who grew up in a very small rural community in Michigan -- and where she lived all her life until she passed last year at age 96.  She knew everyone, and knew when the kids graduated and got married.  She knew which parents passed locally run businesses on to their children, and when grandchildren in the community were born.

Our First Corgi Family

Reaching this age, Phil and I are finding that we too are saying "goodbye" to various members of our community and friends -- most of whom we consider our ohana (family in Hawaiian.)   This last month two very special friends have passed, and as is our custom, we pulled out our collection of photos and memorabilia of those we remember.  We decided to set up our "All Saints" altar early this year, to honor those who had an impact on our lives. My former husband and our adopted daughter passed away many years ago, as have both of our Best Persons at our wedding.

This last week, however, my dear yoga teacher and friend, Elsa Rubio, passed peacefully in her sleep.  As we began to assemble some of the many keepsakes, we also pulled out the collection of dogs tags all strung onto one of their old collars -- in remembrance of our four-legged family too.  (Chauncy R. Valentine, Abbey Ennis Puddin'chin, and Dexter Dinkums Wigglesworth III.)

...and we open our hearts to all the memories of these beloved ones especially as we draw closer to All Hallow's Eve, (Christian) Hallowmas, All Saints Day (Catholic), or Samhain (Gaelic/Celt) -- or the more familiar/secularized "Halloween."   Many of these traditions also include a celebration of the year's harvest with special feasts.